My family is really really close. We are so close with each other that we can live without having any friends, as long as we have each other. This year, it has been so quiet around the house since my brothers aren't here with us. I think I've mentioned a lot of times where they're studying. So there are only 4 left at home. Mom, Dad, my sister and I. As loud as my sister and I can be, it's still not the same without our brothers. Of course when we go out, I get the extra space I never had in the car when both of them are still here but I don't care!! I don't care if I don't have a seat in the car, as long as they're home! I miss them so bad and what more when Ramadhan is here. It's so quiet at the dining table now during iftar. If last time, Mom had to cook a whole bunch of meals, now, sometimes it feels weird to cook for just a small number of people. And we don't even eat that much! So this year, we ended up throwing away food because we just can't eat them all. I know it's a waste and it's against Islam to waste like that but what can we do? It's not like we can force our tummy to accept food any more when it's already full.
My elder brother sometimes Facetime us during Sahur, so it's not that bad. He would watch us eat and when he wanted to cook for his iftar there in US, he would call and asks Mom for recipes. It's so different from then and now. My younger brother is in boarding school so it's a little bit strict. Which means we barely hear from him.
I can't imagine what Raya will be like this year without my elder brother. I just don't want to celebrate without complete presences of my family :(
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