December 25, 2010


I'm not a saint myself, nor am I extremely religious. I don't wear hijab around my head but I come from a family that take our prayers seriously. I still remember when my brother and I were little (way back when both my little sister and brother weren't born yet), my parents were so strict about praying 5 times a day, it's compulsory for us to go for Quran lessons at night and we started fasting at the age of 5. Even now, my parents are still strict about these things but mostly to my little sister and brother because my brother and I know better than to skip our daily prayers. We've become somewhat independent Muslims, thanks to the early lessons from our parents. I used to be a naughty girl where I always purposely stayed in the shower longer than I supposed to just so my brother will go to our night Quran lessons without me. I was lazy to go because we had to cycle ourselves in the dark alleys at the back of our house to the Ustazah's house and I hate this part so much because I had to cycle in my Baju Kurung and a long hijab around my head. There was this one time, my hijab was stuck at the bicycle's pedal. My brother took a few minutes to get it out and he had to tore it up to get it unstuck. The fact that Ustazah's house was so stuffy and hot made me even lazier. When my brother went to high school and stopped Quran lessons, Mom switched me to another Ustazah and this time I didn't dread. Because the Ustazah is fun and I didn't mind staying late just to complete my lessons every night. I learned how to pray from this Ustazah better than the one before and I learned pretty much everything I know now from this Ustazah.

Now, even if I don't go to Quran lessons anymore, I still remember how to read Jawi and I can write Jawi fine. I pray and I came to realise that pray is the only way to soothe you and if you really want to change to a better person, you should start by not missing your 5 daily prayers. I used to be so rebellious as a teenager and now I realised that the reason I became that person was because I always miss my daily prayers. I tend to do things that hurt my parents' feelings and things I know I'll regret later on in life. Thank God I have my family around me and Zahir to make me snap back to someone sane. I promised myself to change and not repeat whatever mistakes I did in the past and I'm glad I started with praying 5 times a day. I find it so life changing. And now whenever I make mistakes or feel so grumpy, it must be because I miss my prayers. When I pray, I feel so calm.

So you see, teenagers these days always roam outside and inside of clubs or have bottles of alcohol in their hands. I don't want to judge people but I'm just glad my parents and Allah love me and they always guide me to grow up as a good person. They taught me what's good and bad. Allah gave me a supportive and loving family, a guy that cares for me, a best friend that has been with me since we were 9 and enough necessities for me to live. Alhamdulillah, thanks to Allah, I'm living a comfortable life without me heading to a wrong direction in life. I may not wear a hijab, but I will come to my senses one day and I will cover my hair when my heart opens up to it and to me our daily prayers are the most crucial if you don't want to head to a wrong path in your life :)

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