July 20, 2011

Changing Wardrobes

Last year, my wardrobe was full with dresses, skirts and shorts. I loved wearing them, especially those adorable Topshop dresses I have. I still have them now but I decided to put them away in a box full of clothes I don't wear any more. I can still fit in those clothes but I changed. My heart changed. I don't know how and I don't know when but when you are raised by a pair of loving and responsible parents, I guess you'll mature in a good way, inside and out.

I used to love wearing anything that bare my legs because I followed the trend. I didn't wear any tank tops, tubes or anything that bare my arms but throw me any shorts, skirts or even short dresses, you'll see me donning them by the side walk the next minute. My wardrobe consisted of shorts, dresses, skirts and more skirts. I didn't wear them because I want people to look, I wore them because I loved them. Both my parents always talked me out of it, especially my Dad, saying we're Islam and we have to take care of our behaviour, the way we dress and stuffs. Sometimes I kept quiet but wore them anyway but sometimes I answered them back, not harshly of course considering the fact that they're my parents (duh!), giving them reasons and whatever I could think of and sometimes I whined.

Dad : Why are you wearing such skimpy clothes? Don't you have anything better to wear?

Me : But all my friends wear it...

Or sometimes..

Dad : Go and change to more covered clothes!

Me : Why can't I wear them? I'm young. I'll start to cover up when I'm married.

The conversations had always been like that, every time. Mom was a little bit more subtle when it comes to advising me. She never really pressured me on changing my wardrobe but she did give me hints like, "wouldn't it be embarrassing if we bump into one of your Dad's friends while we're out and they see you wearing that?" or sometimes, she would say something mean like, "your legs look huge in that skirt". I didn't care most of the time, I strut the malls in shorts and skirts anyway. I was a stubborn child. Maybe I still am, a little. Hehe.

Despite me being stubborn about clothings, I never raised my voice at my parents. I might be a really stubborn daughter but I still know about respect and I know my parents are my everything. I won't be anything without them. So, I'm proud of myself now because my parents don't have to advise me on clothings any more. Like I said, my heart changed.

I have no idea when I started to change or what made me change. But I do have a few reasons why I suddenly felt like it's time for me to throw away all those skimpy clothes I owned. I felt that it's time for me to be a more responsible Muslim now than before. If last time I wore skirts, now I wear jeans. If last time Mom had to remind me about my prayers, now I automatically know when it's time to pray. I'm not saying I change a lot or that I've grown into such a saint, no. I'm saying that the smallest things in me has changed for the better. I still haven't wear hijab around my head, I still gossip around with my friends, I still waste my money on unnecessary things and all kinds of stuffs that Islam doesn't approve. I'm far than a perfect Muslim but at least I'm trying to get there and I know I have so many things I have to change to be a good Muslim.

Hijabs are compulsory for Muslim women but to me, if their hearts are not sincere and are forced to wear them, there's no point on wearing the hijabs anyway. It's all about sincerity and do it for your love towards Allah. Not because you want to follow the trend or something. I see so many women in Malaysia donning the various styles of hijabs, but have you ever wondered about their sincerity and their hearts? Islam forbids Muslims to show off, to wear something so others can see their fabulous styles. I know that it's not good to plan an outfit just so people would stare and admire us but can we really help it? With all that's happening in this world right now? Press and media are really getting into most of our heads these days and I admit, I am influenced by the media too. I watch tutorials on Youtube and wanted to try the new style or I saw Mary-Kate Olsen holding a nice bag and the next thing I know, I'm buying a new similar bag. Those kinds of things are the things that turn us into such negligent people without us realising. You'd be lying if you say you haven't been influenced by the Internet or the media even just a little. Can you find someone who doesn't own a Facebook/Twitter/Tumblr/Blogspot account? I doubt it. Unless they live in a cave and don't know the existence of the Internet. It's not wrong to be open towards all these things but make sure you know your limits and don't get too caught up. If you're too influenced by all these entertainment we have now, you might change little by little without you realising it. Just think, your parents raise you to be a good person in the future, with good moral values, remember to pray and appreciate all their hard work. Don't you think the least we can do for them is to grow up being a good person inside and out? I know it's hard for us to be a complete saint or a perfect person, it's quite impossible if you ask me. But at least avoid the things you know you shouldn't do and do the things you should do sincerely for the love towards Allah and your parents.

My parents guided me a lot and I love them so much!

Like me, I used to wear all those skirts and shorts, sure, they were comfortable and one of the easiest and most comfortable clothing I've worn but now, I just don't find them flattering any more. I feel awkward if I still wear them out in public. Now that I'm a grown up, I know my responsibilities. I still haven't cover up my hair but I hope one day, I will. For now I'm glad I've covered up a little and that I realised what's good and what's bad.

See, you can still be hotter than Megan Fox even if you're not as sexy as her.
Okay Ayeen, that's so not funny. But whatever, you get my point.

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